What every new parent should know: Diana Eidelman at TEDxBGU
What every new parent should know: Diana Eidelman at TEDxBGU
Drawing from her experience as a mother and a Family Counselor, Diana Eidelman shares her insights into challenging and often contradictory experiences that define parenting in the modern world. By drawing on keen insights into the psychology of both parent and child, Diana encourages listeners to consider the importance of active interaction, emotional stability, sustenance and physical touch to both infants and parents during the early, critical stages of child development.
In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)
Parenting is terrifying.. maybe because I study psychology and early childhood education!
I’m truly debating if I want children.
We’re overpopulated and not having children sounds selfish to society.
However, having kids also sounds selfish since none of us asked to be here.
I’m a teacher, maybe I should stick with my career.
I have the opportunity to see children grow and learn without them being mine.
Why did have a baby if you didn’t know this already. How could you not know this.
Needed this! Thank you
… "in developed countties?"… Why?
Thank you ♥️
Great start of the talk. So real and practical words…
09:10
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Thank you so much for this. Baby has been going through a sleep regression and hasn’t been moulding to what we think he should he doing. I ended up frustrated, exhausted and sending him by my in laws (I’m also dealing with mild ppd). He’s on his way back to me now and I promise to try giving him the GIFT and letting him just be a baby
I loved your talk. I didn’t want your talk to finish. I want to hear you more.
What a child will remember is whether or not you cared. My mother feels guilty about "mistakes" she made with me decades ago. I don’t even remember the stuff she is so stressed over and feels so guilty about.
What u spoke is exactly what happened with me. Same lifestyle that u had, i had. Same like you, no experience with babies. N same pain n screwed up after my first!!! No guidance. Totaly with our self.
I did 8 years of Sales before I had my baby.
Before being a mum my whole week was about KPIs. It was stressful but when you hit your KPI it was super satisfactory. You can calculate the incentives by the amount of work you put in. My whole life was dominated by numbers.
So when I had baby, guess what
No quantitative measurement of the effort I am putting. No ROI.
It drive me crazy. I was confused all the time. I kept having this anxiety that I was doing something wrong.
I made an excel chart to track my babies feeding and pooping. Lol
My mum told me to relax.
She said that if they cry than that means they are either hungry or wet or sometimes they just want to cry. Hold them love them and forget the rest.
I was scared that if I hold him too much he will get used to it, but my mum said that this moment will pass so soon and I will regret that I didn’t hold him enough. And it was so true.
As a first time parent, this is so helpful and reassuring. Thank you. And the comment section is so thoughtful and useful too. great video and community section.
This is great, especially go. It is so true. Babies need to Goooo. Although I do think F should be Fresh air. Whenever I bring my unsettled baby out into fresh air outside, they always seem to feel peaceful. Watching the world around them. Or when my kids got hurt and they are crying hysterical. I step out side hot or cold, rainy too. And they just shut it down. Its amazing.
I’m only 8 weeks pregnant and already feel overwhelmed and anxious about this whole process and wondering if I’ll be able to be a good mom when I know I’ll be so tired and sleep deprived. So thank you for somehow rationalizing this absolutely crazy time
"We adore but we are at war"
Wow. So because you can’t watch TV like you wanted you are at war with your child? And everything you try to do is ruined by your baby? Honestly, this approach sounds like selfish parenting
Useful. So needed to new parents. This needs to be told to all “to be” parents.
Hope I listened to this talk two years ago
I had my first baby at 35. Before that I had a successful career. Let me tell you; being a mother is by far the hardest thing I have ever done. I look back and wonder how I managed it especially the first couple of years X
I’m so glad i heard about high needs babies pretty soon after having my girl… i thought i was taking crazy pills…I’d never seen a baby like this! I was so happy to know it was a "thing" so i wouldn’t have to wallow in thinking I was doing something wrong. She is fabulous… but a high needs baby will show you what youre NOT going to do!
This was my exact experience as a new mom.
I have twins in initial days it was very hard to manage every thing and I feel depressed about everything but after few days I realized that it’s all in my head and as you said it’s all about ourselves your advice really helped me thanks a lot.
That is Why I never wanted kids. Its too stressful.
Nice video. Many parents are not aware of the importance of touch to early brain development.
This is building
This was so helpful ❤️❤️❤️
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I LOVE youtube!
I’m a stay at home dad of a new borne and this is still so much easier than construction…..
Moral of the story: no ones ever ready.
thank u so much
"But when your spouse comes home it’s not something you are going to brag about." Why not? I would.
Wonderful, sensible and inspiring little talk. It comes as a timely g.i.f.t. to my wife and myself, less than two weeks into parenthood 🙂
Here after a week as a new parent. This was really helpful
Truth!
Well I hope that like any healthy spirited mother you would be proud of her even if she did not have children. If she had told you that she wants to focus on her career, travel, date or live her life to the fullest without kids I do hope you would’ve been proud also. As a mother. Because as long as you are fertile, making babies is easy. Raising them is another story. Women tend to live in a fairytale world posting about their kids on FB flaubting it just like the Watts did and look what behind closed doors happened. You cannot assume life is perfect by looking at what people post. Of course they only post the good stuff. Women are free now. We are not baby making machines. We can adopt. Take our own decisions and still be strong and hard working. This world is insane. Tons of kids need to be adopted. We don’t need to make more babies. It’s selfish.
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I don’t have sympathy because no one forced you have a baby and a child is such a gift.
I am a new dad of a baby that is 5 days old. And yesterday I started counting the number of sucks to measure the efficiency of feeding 🙂
BTW I am not a western mom and I can relate to every word of this.
I was disappointed when the video ended after 12 minutes. I wish it lasted longer!
Fantastic talk! I have run into a very frustrating rut with my toddler recently, and we need to reboot our schedule so that we are both happier. Thank you for this information.
Separation Anxiety
I’m 7 months pregnant and freaking out about this. But this helped. I realise it will be hard and different. But I will find a way to get through this.
This wasn’t that useful…sorry I thought there was something more here than there is
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING: Procreation is child abuse.
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